When my mom found the bottle of vodka in my room, the first thing she said was "Patric, I hope you were drinking for recreation and not for escape. Our family has a very addictive personality."
I know my addiction, it is hard to get over it. It is not the traditional alcoholism, or sex, or food(love that too, not to the addiction level though). No, it is nothing like that.
I really do not know how to describe it. It is an addiction to the person I love, even though they are not ready. I have tried to let go so much over the past few months but always try to win her back. I really do not know how to though.
I have prayed, I have ran to distractions, I have even started going to therapy.
Nothing is really helping, I want her to be safe and to wait for me. I do not understand what is going on really.
It is really my poison. I am fighting it and losing, many times over so far.
Well, as of now I am ten minutes sober. I will try to carry on.
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1 comment:
sounds to me like she either needs to make a commitment to you, or you've got to let her go.
it's doing you no good to be in the position that you are in. and doing her no good either.
that's my thoughts, take it or leave it.
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